Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Highs And Lows...
There are highs and lows in blood pressure, water levels and tides, barometric pressure, and altitude. Not to mention how hot air balloons go high and low, and so do roller coasters, mountains and valleys, and numerous other things.
This week has started off to be a really bad health week for me. Sunday night I felt funny and decided to check my blood pressure… high. Monday, I felt worse, but when I checked my blood pressure it was… low. Yesterday, again I felt horrible, and this time it was high in the morning and low in the afternoon.
As I have been dealing with these changes in my body from unknown causes, I am struck by the frailty of the human form. Sometimes we feel so invincible. There are those who truly are the strongest in the world, the smartest, the most ingenious, but… in the scheme of the day-to-day or a lifetime, all they have is worth- NOTHING. Even the strongest person will know what it feels like to be weak when the flu hits, or something worse. Even the smartest will feel slighted when someone smarter than him comes along. Even the most ingenious will feel simple at some point. Things like tragedy, death, weather, etc… they put us all at the same level of vulnerability. Think about how too many sunless days drive us into doldrums, or how too little sleep makes us cranky and out of sorts, or how too much stress makes us anxious and unhealthy… And these are just some examples out of many possible ones. We have highs and lows in emotions, physically, psychologically, economically, geologically, and in every area of life.
I am reminded of how wonderful it is to serve a living God who has promised us many things: to remain CONSTANT, to never leave or forsake us, to help us in our times of need, to give us strength when we are weak, to give us joy in our sorrow, to give us hope in difficult moments… I am in awe of Him. He, who is God of the Universe, chooses to associate with us, these weak, selfish, often hard-of-hearing beings, who push Him away until it is convenient or until we have “need” of Him.
For days I can go about my duties barely thinking about Jesus and His blessings to me, then, in a moment of stress, ill health, or confusion, all of a sudden I REMEMBER to think about Him, to include Him in my days. Why are we often so forgetful, so absentminded, so independently dependent???
Why can’t we just see our need for Him and live as close to Him as possible? Why don’t we include Him in every moment, since He knows all anyhow and can help us? Why do we really think that we can manage without Him?
I struggle with this myself. I try so hard to be consistent in my relationship with God, and you know what, I cannot tell you how many times I have had to ask Him for forgiveness for forgetting to “check in”. How can I continually leave my Best Friend out of my life, so unintentionally? We would never do that with a flesh-and-blood best friend. We include that person in every possible detail of our lives, and rush to share at the earliest possible moment when we have something to share.
That is what Jesus wants in relationship with us, with me… to be a part of everything, and to really BE A PART of the day-to-day occurrences, ins-and-outs, moment-by-moment activities, and challenges of our days and lives.
Lord, you know my heart, that I desire to be called Your faithful friend. You know that I have many good intentions to include You into my days, but… I know that good intentions don’t mean anything unless they are followed by action. Help me, please, to do better. I want You in my life. I NEED You in my life. Draw my heart closer to Yours. I want to know You more… Amen.